Gimbap and meatballs

I made meatballs last night and I wrapped gimbaps this morning.

I kneaded meatballs and thought about my friend’s daughter. She is as pure as fresh water. Isn’t it a thirst that leads to sweetness after drinking soda, but a pure water taste that pushes out a long thirst?

Meatball is the recipe that my father-in-law taught me. Poured milk on the two leftover breads and knead with ground meat, chopped onion, egg, salt, and ketchup, garlic. I thought of my father-in-law who said, “You should not rinse spaghetti in water,” while baking the round meatballs that wouldn’t be burn in a frying pan.

Gimbap is usually made mainly with only avocado and the cucumbers that were pickled the day before. I prefer to eat to dip gimbaps into soy sauce with wasabi, but this time I made it with kids' favorite cucumber and spam.

My friend’s daughter without a car said she had to go to Pennsylvania two hours away. Knowing the sorry situation of her without a car, I voluntarily went with her. Although I had been wandering the road on the way, but the fields and the mountains looked more charming and I enjoyed the time.

She was very grateful for helping. I packed gimbap because I though she would be sorry if I bought lunch for her at the restaurant. I also made meatballs last night because she would felt uncomfortable when we came back in the dim evening and rush to prepare a meal. I no longer held her who was constantly sorry to eat spaghetti at my home.

What happen? Is that the way it is? Today’s mature girls are more gentle and humble than adults. I am ashamed of myself for making a big voice in front of them shamelessly. I comforted myself with the excuse that I was talking unnecessary things out of fear that she might be uncomfortable the silence with me, but I am embarrassed and regretful.

Not long ago, three women, including me, chatted in a Chinese restaurant. The girls sitting next to us quietly caught our eyes. I can’t stop thinking about myself without stop chatting loudly even if I had the conscious of the girl's poignant gaze. How dare I am going to grow old with impudent and a big mouth!

I used to be as innocent once as my friend’s daughter. Did I go too far?