A long time ago, I hurt a child. I didn't mean
it, but I had to lie. Twenty-seven years later, the child's cries are still
vivid.
A Korean grandmother lived next to my
apartment. When we meet in the hallway, we only say a few words of greeting.
One day, I said I was going to visit Seoul for a while, and I got a call a few
days later. She asked me if I would take a three-year-old boy to his biological
grandfather in Seoul.
She was said that the child's father went to
America first to settle down. The child's mother waited for her husband to
invite them. But when she didn't hear from husband, she came to New York with
child in search of her husband. She went to her husband's address and stayed up
all night waiting by the door many days, but she couldn't meet him.
After suffered with her child, she met a man
who would remarry. However, it was a story that a man who was trying to remarry
had to send the child to his husband's parents.
The mother came to the airport carrying a child
who slept in a sad way. "When you
arrive at Gimpo Airport, child grandfather will take him," She told me and
handed the child over to me. The mother stood crying until she could not see
us.
The child who was sleeping on the plane woke up
crying for his mother. I comforted him by calling his name. The child fell
asleep again after being unable to check his mother's face because it was dark
inside the plane. I had to get off in Alaska for a while. When the light came
on, the child began to cry, looking for his mother. No matter how much I tried
to appease him, he was obstinate. "If you keep crying, I won't take you to
your mother," I said, half intimidated. The child stopped crying after a
moment's thought. Sensing that the situation was serious, a child clung to me
thinking that if he lost me who knew his name, he would never see her mother
again.
It was heartbreaking to think that the obedient
child was getting away from his mother without knowing anything about it. We
became quite close when we flew to Korea.
When we arrived at Gimpo Airport, the child cried
and clung to me so as not to go to his biological grandfather. How does he know
his grandfather who broke up with him when he was a baby? When he woke up,
there was no mother, and a woman who knew his name promised him to take to his
mom, so he listened carefully and followed her. But the woman lied and left him
to unknown grandfather. The child was so embarrassed that he couldn't help but
hold onto my skirt and try not to fall off.
The child, caught by his grandfather gave me a
grudging look and said, "Mom, Mom," and struggled to come to me.
It is said that a parent's divorce hurts a
child, such as cutting the body in half. I became an accomplice in the wounds I
inflicted on the child. I feel sorry for myself for doing such a thing.
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