Role models for our couple

When I was 30 years old, I got married and chose my favorite senior as my role model, but when he divorced his wife and went back to Korea, he said. 

"Don't make me your role model. I'm not worthy." 

I observed the seniors around me to find a new role model. There were three or four of them, but the one that has remained the same is Mr. and Mrs. John Pai, a sculptor.

The first school I was accepted to was Adelphi University in Garden City, Long Island. I was so bored and lonely in the middle of nowhere that I visited Pratt Institute, where I had applied for admission. A small, confident Korean woman was in the office talking to a student. After waiting for a while, I left the office. I found out later that she was professor John Pai's wife. The area around Pratt Institute is now a safe neighborhood of quaint brownstones, but in 1981, Myrtle and Willoughby avenues were so rough that no taxi driver would go there. Even in broad daylight, robbers were robbing students coming out of banks, so I decided it would be safer to transfer to NYU.

Thanks to my husband, I used to get invited to the house of prof. John Pai, who lived in Brooklyn, for year-end parties. When the clock chimed midnight, everyone clinked champagne glasses to ring in the new year. I thought to myself, ‘How can there be so many glasses in the house?’ One year, as I listened to Nam June Paik play the piano, I thought to myself, "Why is this famous man wearing a coat with a torn pocket sticking out of it? 

Even after Prof. John Pai moved to Connecticut, I was invited back from time to time. The food was of the finest quality (the miso paste and chili powder came from Korea), the flowers were the most precious flowers available at that time, and the house was decorated beyond description. When I'm thinking about what I'm going to bring to the house, I get a call from Mrs. John Pai's wife saying, "Don't bring anything," They came to my solo exhibition a long time ago and bought a painting. Every time I visit their home, that little painting is there to greet me. Three or four times she gave me kimchi. 

The architecture of the house, which was built in the 1700s, has been remodeled into a cozy atmosphere without losing its original. The crystal clear stream that runs through the vast green garden is a welcome respite from city life. The deep flavors of John Pai's wife's food are enchanting, and I often find myself ruefully recalling all the food I didn't get to eat the day I was invited. Her home is inimitable and unimaginably sensual. She seems to have been born with a refined sense. 

Not long ago, she invited some artist friends over, including a photographer. I received photos that turned out great. Everyone in the picture looks happy. Especially my husband.

"You are so happy to see you in the picture." 

"I'm happy to see that Mr. and Mrs. John Pai are still living well and healthy. I admire him, but especially his wife."

"These two are our role models."