Energy man

My eldest child works and studies in the field of energy — things like solar, carbon, and batteries. It’s all about saving energy to protect nature… or something like that. Honestly, I don’t fully understand the technical stuff, but he often talk about it at the dinner table. It’s kind of fitting — a kid who was always bursting with energy now studies energy. It feels like he has found the right path.

Raising such a high-energy kid was no easy job. Once, I was pushing the stroller only to realize the baby had already crawled out and was making their way down the street! Another time, he fell headfirst from the bed, his heavy head hitting the floor with a sound like a watermelon splitting open. Even now, as an adult, when they do something a bit ridiculous, I wonder if it’s the aftershock from all those childhood tumbles.

To manage all that excess energy, I started swimming lessons when he was just six months old. Once in the water, he never wanted to come out. He was so good that the coach even talked about the Olympics. But being full of energy doesn’t automatically make someone a swimmer. My child couldn’t handle the pressure of diving in right on the starting gun, and eventually gave it up. Even energy couldn’t overcome nervous tension.

Unlike my younger child, this one always has a full schedule and a lot of interests. And let’s not even talk about the endless number of girlfriends. Who do they take after? I guess I’ll admit — probably my own father. Otherwise, I’d have to listen to my husband’s long rants about how my dad was quite the ladies’ man himself.

Whenever my son got dumped by a girl, I’d say:
“Well, it’s your fault. She found someone better — good for her.”
And when he seemed like he was pulling away from a girl he was dating, I’d say:
“Just give her a little more time. Don’t you feel bad for her? She grew up without a mom, raising her little sibling alone.”

Honestly, it felt like I was the one who got dumped.

"My dear son, while the energy you study is important, maybe it’s time to stop wasting your emotional energy on one girl after another. I hope you can build a lasting relationship with the girl you’re seeing now. Every time you fight and break up, it affects your work and your studies too, doesn’t it? Try to be aware of what your girlfriend wants, and be quick to take care of her. Don’t make her suffer — because when a woman gets angry, the energy from that anger will hurt you, hurt her, and somehow even reach me, your poor mom. Breaking up with girls has almost become a habit for you. I don’t know which one of them is meant to be your true partner."

Even though he came from my own belly, I really can’t figure him out.