She resembles the Atlantic Ocean

 Every late summer for several years, visiting a friend. And I diligently returned home. As soon as I entered the kitchen, I laid out the soaked rice in a cast iron pot, filled it with sesame leaves, and put shrimp in it, and cooked. While the rice was cooking, minced green onion and red pepper and prepared seasoned soy sauce with plenty of almond powder. 

 My husband and I ate sesame leaf rice with soybean paste stew and sesame leaf kimchi made by a friend. Our couple fell in love with the scent of sesame leaves and became talkative. 

“The famous French chef came to Korea and fell in love with the scent of sesame leaves.” 

I don't want to miss my husband's happy moments. 

“Can I cook sesame leaf rice and sesame leaf pancake again tomorrow? We should eat them all while they are fresh.” 

 My friend also gave me red peppers, cherry tomatoes, and zucchini. Kakaotalk came, regretting that she forgot not to give the zucchini leaves and pears. 

 It was exactly 31 days ago. It was right after I gave birth to the second child. The moment we met at a small church in Flushing, we were somehow attracted to each other and became friends. Was it because all the church members were deacons, but it wasn't just the two of us, so we were called 'Non-deacon'? So far, while being friends, there has never been a single quarrel or disappointment. Perhaps it was because of her consideration. She is a small giant. she is short, but her heart literally resembles the Atlantic Ocean near her house. 

 It's just like that today. To go out to the backyard of her house and pick sesame leaves, I must be armed to avoid mosquito bites. She was worried that I would be bitten by mosquitoes, so she cut and stacked the whole stems of sesame leaves in the room that goes out to the backyard. I sat on the cushion and quietly picked sesame leaves and fell into thought. She is always considerate of me so that I don't have a hard time. Then, what kind of consideration did I give her? I don't remember. I only remember receiving it from her. 

 We met occasionally while going through hardships to raise two children and live well. Now that the children are adults and we are growing old together, we see each other more often than before. I chatter and my friends listen to my chatter. At the next meeting, I should hold back my chatter and listen to her, but it's not that easy. Is it because I haven't been able to open my mouth for nearly two years because of this fucking COVID-19? I tried to make excuses, but to be honest, I felt more at ease when I admitted that I was a natural chatterbox. 

 I am not religious, but I do not pass by the cathedral. If the door is open, I always go in and pray. Before I broke up with her, I stopped by her church. It is a small white church. The pure and cozy atmosphere of the church relieved tension and made my heart warm. We each prayed quietly.