After parting

My feet are heavy. I feel empty. I walk slowly through an empty park without looking around, because a friend who walked with me just moved away recently. I thought we walked and get older together, but she left all of a sudden. I can't believe it's this empty.

She must be busy unpacking and adapting to the new neighborhood by now. As if she was coming up to me who walking around alone, and became friends, she is already meeting up to someone and walking together the Washington Square with that refreshing touch of hers, isn't she? She did not go far, just moved near NYU. She strolls in the vibrant park where are many young people and I hang around in a promenade with many old people.

The Riverside Park I walk on is a simple park that is boring and long along the Hudson River like the foot of Mt. Jiri in Korea. I sometimes sit looking at the river as if I were waiting for someone while I enjoy walking by the boring charm of this park. A meeting with her, who suddenly appeared in front of me one day, was precious as if she had been given an unexpected gift. Even on days when we had no plans to meet, I used to walk around in small anticipation that we might bump into each other by accident. But now it's no use looking around makes me feel even lonelier.

During my school days, I am reminded of a middle-aged man, who was guiding Mt Jiri. He guided us through the mountain, starting at Namwon, Jeolla-do and ending at Guri. In the evening, we would gather around the campfire and made a noise. He looked at us silently. When it was time to go to sleep, he was dragging a huge stone that had been heated in the fire into an old military tent. His rear view of dragging the stone seemed very lonely.

I wondered about the man's life. But I was too shy and busy chatting with my friends. Leaving the mountain, we went to a busiest and glittering Seoul and he headed to a dark, damp forest. His dim back is coming to mind. To be left is a very sad thing rather than to leave.

It is fortunate that the winter in which my friend 's moving season has shrunk has passed and it is a bright spring day. A new life has been revived where she left and a daffodil comes out and smiles affectionately. Branches gather the buds. Tulips such as an arrogant woman with a cape also raise their neck all over and welcome to spring. The cherry blossoms in the warm spring air are shy and twinkly. The world suddenly looks bright.

I walk with concentrate on the breath I feel in my nose. My body relaxes and my delusions disappear. The birds sound sweeter and clearer. It's fun to walk together, but isn't it good to walk alone?